Friday, May 29, 2009

Remember old boarding school songs?

Boarding school holds some bittersweet memories for most of us. Yet there were some students who just couldn’t bear the strain and bailed-out after their first term, or first year, or even after three years.
For those die-hards who endured the rigors and pains of boarding school life for six whole years, I defer to you! Trust me, it’s not an easy feat to achieve. Sometimes when the going gets tough, students resort to pouring their sorrows into songs. It sorta helps lighten the burden and ease the heart.
There are some songs that no matter where you are, they just remind you of boarding school.
Like this one that is mainly sung when students are running low on supplies:

My dear mother;
I am very sorry;
For writing this letter;
Please buy me sugar, and butter, and bournvita.

There is this one for when SS3 students are ready to graduate:

Everyday senior, senior; Everyday senior, senior;
Senior don’t forget us, your junior ones are crying;
Senior don’t forget us, your junior ones are weeping;
We don’t know what to do, We don’t know what to do;
It is a pity and very painful that our seniors are leaving us;
We don’t know what to do, we don’t know what to do.

Also, an old one, but I’m not sure which school is it’s source, but we sure did sing it a lot:

Booze garri, Booze garri;
In the house;
Add some sugar;
Add some milk;
Add some water;
Garri in the morning, afternoon and night;
Garri gives you energy, makes you feel all right;
Booze garri!

There is this other one that comes with several variations:

Give me a heartbeat: Mm-mm!
Give me a sneeze: At-choo!
Give me a cough: U-huh, u-huh!
All together: Mm-mm, at-choo, u-huh u-huh!
Give it to me one more time: At-choo, u-huh, mm-mm!

There must be many more, so if you remember any, please feel free to post it here. Thanks!
Let’s keep the torch burning high and bright, for there’s no other experience like that of boarding school life.

Lotta Luv,

Advance copies of FEDDIE GIRL the novel are coming this July. Copies will be available by reservation only. Go to Bernard Books Publishing to reserve your copy now!

Monday, May 18, 2009

Boarding School in Nigeria???

"I need a junior girl!"
"Last man in the house!"
"Who wants to fetch my water?"
"Who has extra soap?"
"Who wants to make a deal with their food?"

Lol!!! Nigerian boarding schools--those were the days!!!

Do you totally remember your first day in a Nigerian boarding school? How unfamiliar, strange, and intimidating everything seemed? Do you remember staring at the other new students that arrived at the same time as you? How you checked each other out and wondered, "Hmm, what primary school did he/she come from?" "What score did he/she get in the Common Entrance and Interview examinations?" Lol! Yeah, I know, no one writes Common Entrance examinations anymore to gain admission into Nigerian Secondary Schools. But fifteen years ago, things were totally different, or so I'm told.

What about the prefects and senior students? Do you remember how huge they looked? One could totally call them 'mothers'. Boy, were they big and scary!
The prefects and their pompous appearance, always strutting about with looks of importance on their faces. Calling out to everyone within reach,
"You, there! Where are you going? Start running to the assembly hall!"
Lol! How easy it was for the prefects to take-down one's name for punishment. How important they felt meting out grass-cutting portions for manual labor. How totally godlike they seemed rationing out hot tea, bread, and boiled eggs for breakfast. For them, the life in boarding house began and ended within their reach. No one remains in the dormitory during classes or prep unless they say so. No one takes a bath during siesta without due permission. No one takes their plate of food outta the dinning hall without a prefect sanctioning it. And woe betide you to hang around in the dorms after the dorm prefect bellows: "Leave the dormitory!"
When you hear, "It's lights out!" You know to fly up your bunk immediately and go straight to sleep! No arguments!

As for the senior students, their sense of self-importance, especially where junior students are concerned, can not be paralleled. It was through them the new students learned there was something like, "Kneel down and fly your hands!" Or, "Decrease your height and hide your eyeballs!" What about, "Go and take your position"? Lol! Those senior students were definitely the height of boarding life--every junior student's nightmare!

If you've ever boycotted manual labor by hiding in the bush, or dove into an over-grown shrub to escape the calls of tardy senior students just returning from home, or pretended to be sick so as not to have to go fetch something for a senior girl during prep hours; then you totally get where I'm coming from.

You remember pretending to be deaf when a senior student is yelling for you from ten feet away? You remember zapping from the dinning hall when it's time to re-arrange the tables and benches for a school function? You remember washing tureens as punishment for failing to take your wet towel with you when leaving the dorm in the morning? You remember being konked on the head for turning in your table tureens late? You remember being locked out of dinning and made to miss a meal for arriving two seconds late to the dinning hall? If you remember all these, then you totally attended a Nigerian boarding school as a JS1 student.

So given all the above, some may wonder why we ever bother to go back for second term and many more terms.

Seriously, "Why do we go back for more?" What is it about boarding school that keeps us enduring and hoping that one day, things would be different and we would be the ones totally sleeping on the bottom bed of a two-bed bunk?

Is it the tuck-shop goodies, the school club activities, the interesting and funny class periods, the pranks played on teachers, the cursing of wicked senior girls, the running-off to fetch water when no one else is by the tank, the zapping from Principal's assembly, the audacity to disappear and escape mass punishments, the hiding in the bush and boycotting manual labor, or what? What did it for you?

What made you look forward to returning to school each new term?

Yeah, we all had tons of fun and made lots of memories while in boarding school. But, if you could do it all over again, would you???

Lotta Luv,


Watch-out for FEDDIE GIRL the international adventure/thriller set in a Nigerian Federal School. Read excerpts at Bernard Books Publishing. Reserve a copy HERE

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Walk in their shoes...?


I'm just wondering:

Last year, my parents freaked out and sent me, their twelve year old daughter, and only child packing to a Federal school in Nigeria to live as a boarder.

Did you just say, "Whoa, that's harsh. Whatever happened to grounding wayward American teens?"

Well, I don't know what you're getting at, but in my way of thinking, I'd say I totally deserve what I got. After all, I wasn't insane when I beat-up two innocent six-year-old's and got my hands on a roll of marijuana.

"Still, that ain't enough reason to ship a child out to a foreign country!" You raise one eye-brow in consternation and shoot darts with your eyes at me. You look ready to spring and knock my poor head off my sorry shoulders.

Alright, alright, back-off! I know better than to ruffle your feathers on the night after your miserable team has lost an easy game of baseball to their equally miserable opponents. Not that I totally agree with your point of view about my being dropped off in boarding school last year, but hey, whatever keeps us cool!

However, I'd still love to hear the humble opinion of a unbiased third party.

So to my blog readers, I ask:

Do you totally think my parents flipped their lids and acted too hastily in their decision to make me attend a Federal School in Nigeria as punishment for what I did last year?
Yes? Hell no?
Had I been your kid, how would you have managed the situation?
In your humble opinion, what on earth, if anything, would a kid have to do that would warrant you to dish-out a punishment as harsh as the one my parents meted out to me?

Who knows? Maybe by answering all or part of the above questions, we may uncover some truths about ourselves and the way we see things within the society we live in.

Totally looking forward to hearing from you...

Lotta Luv,

For excerpts of the upcoming FEDDIE GIRL novel by Nona David, visit
To reserve your copy of FEDDIE GIRL, please go to

Saturday, May 9, 2009

Carlotta's friendly reminder...

Hello there,

Have you read my story?

Read excerpts of FEDDIE GIRL, the sizzling international adventure/thriller by Nona David. This novel features me as the major character and is all about my experiences in an all-girls boarding school in Nigeria. It also tells what my family were up to while I was safely tucked out of the way in boarding house. Lol!!!

Ever been to Nigeria??? No??? Gosh! You need to read this novel. Lol!!!

Actually, that is kinda what this whole blog thingy is about, wouldn't you say?

Did I hear you say, "Oh, alright, Carlotta, I will read the excerpts"? Yep, that's what I'm talkin' about. :)

Anyways, don't miss this opportunity to read never-before-seen excerpts of this novel and reserve your copy at the publishers site: Bernard Books Publishing.

You can also drop a line for the author by signing the guest book!!!

See ya,

Saturday, May 2, 2009

Fela: I throway salute!!!

Salute to the master; Bow to the king!

I've never met a Nigerian who doesn't know who Fela was. I say 'was' cos Fela passed on several years ago, but his legacy still lives on--in the hearts and minds of his fans.

"Who is Fela?" you ask, your mind already going through the list of famous artists you're familiar with.

Fela is a legend. An artist who's famous for not just his music, but the meanings behind every word he sings. To understand Fela and what goes on in his mind, you gotta go right back--back to the deep-rooted culture of his people.

You give me that 'what the heck are you talking about?' look.

I ignore you and shake my head in pity. Unless you've lived in Nigeria and seen things for yourself, you'll probably never get why Fela means so much to those who are lucky to have had the pleasure of his entertainment/teaching.

Abruptly you ask, "What makes Fela's music so famous?" Your mind is already browsing through the 'rock and roll' legends you've been opportuned to know: The Beatles, Kiss, Rolling Stone, Steely Dan, James Gang, Jonas Brothers(?) Lol!!!

Well, I totally can't capture the true essence of Fela Kuti and what his music means to Nigerians and many Africans at large. What I can do, is give his dedicated fans a chance to speak from their hearts and tell you exactly what it is they root about Fela's songs.

So, all you Nigerians out there, if you're a true fan of Fela Anikulapo Kuti, tell us why you love his music, tell us what his music means to you.

I totally rest my case!

Lotta luv,


To read excerpts of FEDDIE GIRL and reserve a copy, visit Bernard Books Publishing